Openly Working Mom or Mum's the Word?

A career question from a friend inspired this post.

What should I write on my resume to explain my time as a stay-at-home mom? Is it better not to mention it?

With so many stay-at-home-parents planning to return to work once their children are ready for daycare/preschool, this is an important question. We know how many talents parenthood has strengthened and developed. 

Seriously, how many other jobs are 24-7?

There are two ways to go about this.

The first is to include it on your resume, and thereby introduce it into your interview.

Pros: 

• Your potential boss knows up front that being a parent is important to you
• During interviews you don’t have to measure every response you give based on whether it will out you as a parent 
• You’ll have less cleaning up to do on your “electronic resume” (everything that turns up on an internet search for you)
•  If the interviewer knows you’re a parent, and has concerns, you can address them and keep the focus on you as a candidate

Cons: 

• Your potential boss knows up front that you are a parent and you consider it important work
• If you’re tied with another candidate and the boss needs something to tip the scales, this would most likely tip them away from you

Why is parenthood often a hiring “con”?

Despite much evidence to the contrary, for example:

• Companies with women at the helm have healthier bottom lines; 
• Working parents have lower than average rates of missed work

Hiring managers, even parents themselves, expect parents to be less invested employees. Yet again stereotype out-muscles truth.

The second option is to hide it by removing months from your resume and sticking to employment years.
(And reducing the appearance of the time gap.)

If the gap is too large you can fill it without mentioning your children: 

What else were you doing then? 

Freelancing, 
providing childcare, 
volunteering, 
taking classes, 
research, 
part time work, etc. 


Reverse the “pros” and “cons” list above. Then, add this pro: 

• You’ll have more interview time to focus your responses on your achievements without having to explain how you’ll balance your work and family commitments. 

And this con: 

• Perhaps that electronic resume cleanup left some cobwebs—she knows you’re a parent, but since you didn’t mention it she can’t gauge how this will impact your work.

More often than not, this choice--to tell or not to tell—boils down to how many options you have. 

Are you in high demand in the workforce? 

If so, talking about your dual role can help you decide if the position is your best option. 

Or, if there’s more competition and this would be too much of a risk, you’ll work out the parenting-workday challenges as they arise.

As for putting it on the resume, with sadness, I recommend you don’t. “Stay at Home Mom/Dad” still carries too many misconceptions. Which raises the question—how do we annihilate the foolish stereotypes?

A Classic: The Mom Song